Monday, April 21, 2008

post vacation post

We have returned from visiting the parental units and adding the first two notches on our 30 stadium tour belt. A bit travel-weary but happy to be home. Trying to kick-start normal routines back to life but so far, not much luck.

Forced myself to go into the kitchen and whip up some dinner. My mother cooked for us every day and well, she managed to raise me without spoiling me so how could she undo all that hard work in one week? Anyhow, I thawed some flounder fillets and scrounged up a couple of lemons for marinade. Did you ever cut a lemon in half, dig out 8 seeds and begin squeezing the juice out only to have another eight seeds try to skydive onto your meal? You catch those and begin to squeeze with abandon, because surely there aren't any more in there, and watch another half dozen fly out. You fish those out only to have a few more slide by. This was the lemon I faced on my reluctant return to the kitchen. The Darwinian Champion of lemons. The Ron Jeremy of Citrus.*

*I realize lemon seeds are more symbolic of ova fecundity than phallic virility. However, the analogy doesn't work very well. We don't tend to look at a female and think, damn, that's a lot of corpus luteum for one woman!

Btw, Happy 420, all you people with the dopey smiles.

The following entries are odds and ends I wrote up offline while on vacation but didn't have the internet zen space to post. They're in no particular order...

2 comments:

fimbulwinter said...

Your produce metaphor was all it should be-zesty, pithy, and sour...well done.

I will brook no competition. I shall have to have you elemonated.

Epiphenita said...

punderful praise from the premier of produce and pithiest of the pith.