Tuesday, August 26, 2008

therapeutic recycling

Stop making that face. This is not a lecture on recycling.

Okay, I'm a liar. This IS absolutely a lecture on recycling.

First, forget all the small print: yes, it is better to reduce and reuse and yes, energy is used to recycle and yes, it's inconvenient and yes, we don't know exactly how much really ends up being used, blah-bah-blah...because
we're throwing away tons of shit that we don't need to throw away. It is wrong on every level. It fucks up our planet, it leaves poison for our children to deal with, hurts our economy and I'm even considering that it destroys our collective soul in an atheistic sort of way. Hell, MacGyver would take all this crap and build another planet with it–all I'm suggesting is that we crunch it up and make something else from it. Like welcome mats or tote bags or something.

Houston is not what you might call an environmentally conscious kind of city. What with the redness of it all and that frontier logic: if god didn't want me to fill up dumpsites, he wouldn't have put 'em there and given me this big honkin' sweet pickup truck.

However, even in Houston recycling is not hard. There are places to take this stuff. There are lots of neighborhoods (like mine, ptl) that have curbside pickup. CURBSIDE PICKUP, for christsake. It gives you no excuse and would only be easier if Mayor White actually walked into your house and carried out your green recycle bin for you. And yet, there are tons of cretins who don't recycle. Jesus Christ on a flapjack, that ticks me off.

Anyhow. We had a party for our dear friend and playwright, Eric, some weeks ago. I may have mentioned it. It was a great fun affair. Much wine and beer was consumed. Now, while my neighborhood does have curbside pickup, they no longer pick up glass. So, we stacked up all the bottles and toted them to the recycling drop-off this past weekend. Here is an aspect of recycling that should appeal to most people (even you earth abusers): we had to throw each kind of glass (clear, green, amber) into separate, enormous containers. They look like industrial barges or rail cars or something.

What
a
fucking
blast.

Go ahead, throw the first one. It has to go pretty far. It crashes and breaks with THE MOST SATISFYING SOUND. I mean, this was (no offense, dear Dr. Ding) better than therapy. Throw, crash, repeat. I was thoroughly exorcised by the time we reached the end of my pile. I only wish I had more bottles in my bin.

Whack-a-mole, step aside. I've discovered breaking glass.


To recap: RECYCLE.

PS. I know there's a Democratic convention going on, by the way. I'm just pacing myself. Besides you can just go here for great convention coverage.

7 comments:

e. said...

wow... two shout-outs in one entry! i feel so special.

and i'm with you... i don't understand the whole not recycling thing. i don't even have children to inherit the planet and i care.

RECYCLE!

StevensVox said...

Oh, I want to break glass!!!
Well, I recycle my plastic bags, wash and reuse plastic containers and use 100% wind energy for my home, but sorry, that is where my contributions end.
Maybe one day when I have a home with the space to have 3 bins and a yard for a compost pile I will be better, but alas I barely have room for my trash can in my kitchen (and I still can't open my fridge without hitting it!).
So I try where I can.
(pouty face)

salsez said...

So where can you go that you can actually throw the glass? There is a recycling place that i take bottles, but you can't throw them anymore. Bummer. I always wanted a room where i could hurl plates against a wall.

epiphenita said...

E, you are my own source of political information...I don't know why I keep advertising it, it's not in my best interest. (You're welcome.)

Steven. You do what you can do...but claiming no space to recycle is kind of a suckshit excuse, babe. I mean that's the POINT!

Sal, I hope the city safety glasses inspector is not paying attention...it's the drop off on Center St in the Heights. It unregulated and messy and perfect.

Narya said...

I cannot recycle. That is, my city has the lamest program in the world, and I live in an apartment building that doesn't have recycling, and I don't have a vehicle, so I must carry my recycling elsewhere (on the BUS or something, fer chrissakes), and even I have my limits. Lately I've been saving the bits and getting a friend to haul the crap once in awhile, but that means I constantly have piles of crushed cans, plastic, and glass sitting around.

It annoys me no end. My home state (New Jersey) has had recycling in place for YEARS, as in DECADES, but the city of Chicago can't manage a program that actually works? What's wrong with that picture?

e. said...

i have a friend in chicago and she's great about recycling. everything i saw in chicago made recycling incredibly easy. and she has curbside.

Narya said...

Your friend either (a) lives in a house, i.e., the city streets & san people pick up her stuff, so she can use blue bags, or (b) she lives in an apartment building where they use a garbage hauler who recycles. Large apartment buildings (like the one in which I live) use private trash hauling, and it's up to the hauler whether to recycle. My current bldg.'s hauler doesn't. Anything else requires me to haul the recycling elsewhere.

they've realized it's a broken system and are starting to fix it, apparently, but so long as there's the private-hauler bit, apartment dwellers are kinda stuck.