not quite a collage of vocabulary mishaps

A client once asked me to take a bunch of photos and make a camouflage out of them. I tried to explain that I was so good at what I did that she wouldn't be able to see anything when I was done.

Not three months later another client asked me to make a decoupage of several pictures.

I am intrigued by a collage of décolletage, however.

wordtherapy

Some people drink when they're depressed. Some sleep. Some write limericks.
laconic
la⋅con⋅ic /ləˈkɒnɪk/ [luh-kon-ik]
–adjective
Using or marked by the use of few words; terse or concise: a laconic reply.

Still waters they say, quite ironic,
run deep 'neath the quiet laconic.
Rejoinders so terse
might intimate worse:
like someone who's 'most catatonic.

peripatetic
per⋅i⋅pa⋅tet⋅ic  /ˌpɛrəpəˈtɛtɪk/ [per-uh-puh-tet-ik]
–adjective
1. walking or traveling about; itinerant.
2. (initial capital letter) of or pertaining to Aristotle, who taught philosophy while walking in the Lyceum of ancient Athens.
–noun
3. a person who walks or travels about.

(A modified limerick, then:)

There once was a peripatetic
who roamed on a wooden prosthetic.
His gait grew frenetic
and almost pathetic
from drinking a potent emetic.

shibboleth
shib·bo·leth (shĭb'ə-lĭth, -lěth')
–noun
1. A word or pronunciation that distinguishes people of one group or class from those of another.
2. A word or phrase identified with a particular group or cause; a catchword; A commonplace saying or idea.
3. A custom or practice that betrays one as an outsider.

Betrayed by his nelly shibboleth
and protesting impediments a myth,
"Velveteen pantaloons
and classic show tunes,
just prove I am very chivalrouth."

Goofy as it seems, I can't even tell you how much better I feel. My only regret is that these limericks are are not dirty at all.

mnemonics, your ass

callipygian

PRONUNCIATION:
(kal-uh-PIJ-ee-uhn)

MEANING:
adjective: Having well-shaped buttocks.

ETYMOLOGY:
From Greek calli- (beautiful) + pyge (buttocks).

How I try to remember new words:

Callie called to her pigeon while leaning over the balcony, her callipygian form silhouetted in the fading light.

Have I mentioned how much I love A.Word.A.Day?

whirled world o' words

The other month while reviewing my entropic collection of foreign stamps (saved for collages, I'll have you know), I found myself thinking about the word philatelist. And resolved to someday write a poem or short story entitiled The Fellating Philatelist. Or The Philistine Philatelist. No, perhaps I'll call it Phil Come Philately.

Anyway, there you have a glimpse of what my mind does while parked in idle. So when I read this entry by one of my recently-found and delightful blogging-pals, Menchuvian Candidate, I squealed in delight (a metaphoric squeal...I am a grown woman, after all) at the following link:

The Museum of [Artificial & Natural] Ephemerata

Because among other things, I am a fan of museums traditional and bizarre. Case in point, the National Museum of Funeral History here in Houston. I can't even tell you how delighted that strange showcase makes me.

Another reason is that this off-beat museum is in Austin! A mere 2-3 hours aways. I WILL make my way there.

But the initial appeal was much more egocentric. It goes so well with my blog handle (10.4, good cyberbuddy). Yes. Much of what I write could be called epiphenita ephemerata.

[ephemeral is defined as
1. lasting a very short time; short-lived; transitory: the ephemeral joys of childhood.
2. lasting but one day: an ephemeral flower.]

More epiphenita ephemerata (yes!) coming your way.

P.S. Thanks also, MC, for the link to this Sarah Silverman schtick.

are we on the same page?

oxymoron: urging people to think outside of the box by using a hackneyed cliché.

way to prate in '08

The Rude Pundit ran a little impromptu (?) haiku contest summing up 2007. I am tickled to have had two of my bastardized japanese poetry concoctions chosen. Nay, heading the list. Rude Pundit, I am honored.

If you're linkaphobic, here they are:

the year of living less freely
didja see those guys
gang-bang the constitution?
motherfuckers all.

election year sports
we brown folk and queers-
neocons' fav boogeymen-
sick of being used.

[I can't wait for the limerick contest.]

And cheers to more happy word abuse:

Remember the Washington Post's sometime word competition (add/change a letter in an established word and make a new one)? Well, here's an overheard in new york beauty:

JAP #1: Is he a Juddhist?
JAP #2: A what?
JAP #1: You know, a Jew Buddhist.
JAP #2: Oh, yeah, totally.

--7 train

and a golden one from my son about his internet-unsavvy friends:

They're so nonline.
[Used without permission. Sorry son, it was just too good and I couldn't wait. I'll will you the gigantic frying pan. Don't tell your sister.]

Happy 2008 people. Resist the urge this year to constantly rhyme '08 with some lame ass saying like It's Not Too Late in Aught Two Double-Oh Eight. Shit.